Honda-SOHC
General => Humour => Topic started by: mike the bike on December 26, 2016, 12:03:48 AM
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A warning to be careful about drink driving as we are getting close to Christmas and police everywhere are out there checking on drivers. Last night I was out for a few drinks. One thing lead to another and I had a few too many pints and then went onto the brandy. Not a good idea. Knowing I was over the limit, I decided to leave my car at the pub and took a bus home. Sure enough, I passed a police checkpoint at the top of the road where they were pulling over cars and performing breathalyser tests. Because I was in a bus they just waved it past. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise as I've never driven a bus before and I am not even sure where I got it from.
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When we were teenagers that story was almost true. Went on a bender, and opening the curtains in the morning revealed a parked double decker bus outside the house. Between us we had a vague recollection of going home on a bus but who drove and where we got it we will never know. The council came and picked it up after we complained it had been dumped there.
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Good joke and story.
There's the old take on that same vein, bunch of lads face a long walk back home after a late night out and one says that they leave all the buses in the depot with keys in them, I'll go and get one he says while you lot keep a look out for me. They all hang around outside but for half an hour there's buses driving back and forward inside the depot, eventually he opens the depot doors and drives out, stops to pick them all up. What took you so long they all ask, well the one that takes us on our route was right at the back, so I had to move all the others before I could get it out.
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I was on a Dragon rally many years ago, with a gang of lads from Salford, where it all got a bit lairy, probably a contributing factor was that by the time we got there the pub had run out of beer, and only had spirits left in small bottles.
I've no idea who had actually booked the coach that turned up at kicking out time, or who was driving, but I know it wasn't ours, and I'm pretty sure someone stole it, on a sudden impulse, and shouted 'get in!'. Again I don't remember why or how, but I ended up in the dark in one of the belly lockers, with several others, we emerged at the rally site. It was left at the gate, and I'm sure it's rightful owners will have got it back.
I still have dental bridgework from later that night, caused by someone who later was best man at my wedding.