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Topics - hairygit
46
« on: October 02, 2014, 11:47:58 AM »
Has anyone else noticed how expensive these things are to buy nowadays? I needed one as major surgery last year has gone wrong, now left with a parastomal hernia and a prolapsed stoma, which means my 750F1 cannot be ridden until further surgery to correct it, but I need to get out on something with 2 wheels, go mad otherwise! Anyway, it seems long gone are the days we could get an okay runner for £50 or so from the back of somebody's garage or shed! Looking around locally found nothing, so looked on e bay, sh#t are they pricey! £8-900 being average for a roadworthy one, with a few over £1500-2000+, question is, why? I managed to get one for £495 in the end, only bidder for a red 1988 C90 Cub, 10 months m.o.t. and tax, fairly tidy, just some of the plastic parts have faded colourwise. Seems they are a good investment with the money they are fetching, often more than the sohc fours of similar condition, so what happened?
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47
« on: April 18, 2014, 04:21:01 PM »
Just to let anyone know that's interested, D.S.S. has just got replica 550K3 exhausts in stock, they certainly look just like the originals, and are a bargain at £600.00 + vat per set (compared to pipes for 750K's!)
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48
« on: September 14, 2013, 04:44:15 PM »
An aetheist was seated next to a little girl on a plane, and he turned to her and said "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up conversation with your fellow passengers" The little girl, who had just started reading her book, replied to the stranger, "What would you want to talk about?" "Oh, I don't know" said the aetheist. "How about why there is no God, or no heaven or hell, or no life after death?" as he smiled smugly. "Okay " she said "Those could be interesting topics, but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same stuff- Grass.Yet a deer excretes little pellets, a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?" The Aetheist, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it, then says "Hmm, I have no idea." To which the little girl replies "Do you really feel qualified to discuss God, heaven and hell, or life after death, when you don't know shit?" And then she went back to reading her book. 
49
« on: September 14, 2013, 04:09:44 PM »
The other night my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her "Only you, the others kept me awake all night!" That must have pissed her off, as she packed my bags and told me to go. As I walked out of the front door, she screamed "I wish you a slow and painful death you bastard!" "Oh," I replied, "So now you want me to stay!" 
50
« on: September 14, 2013, 04:00:01 PM »
After suffering from depression for a while, the wife and I decided we were going to commit suicide. But strangely enough once she'd killed herself I started to feel a lot better. So I thought "Stuff it, soldier on!" 
51
« on: September 14, 2013, 03:55:54 PM »
The wife is on the warpath again! Last night she was up for making a sex movie, all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part
52
« on: September 06, 2013, 04:29:21 PM »
Just to let anyone interested know, Dave Silver Spares now has reproduction caliper bodies in stock for the above models. They are exact replicas, and are fully interchangeable with standard parts, just under £50 + V.A.T., means we don't have to buy overpriced secondhand crap from e-bay anymore He also has replica caliper pistons as well
53
« on: August 26, 2013, 03:04:02 PM »
A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess. The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for a clue. The dad said, "Well, it's what mummy calls me sometimes." The little girl screams to her brother, "Don't eat it! It's an ass hole! 
54
« on: August 26, 2013, 03:01:15 PM »
My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off.
55
« on: August 26, 2013, 02:59:44 PM »
I woke up this morning at 8 and could smell something was wrong. I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing ! Toast burning, saucepan boiling over. I panicked. I didn’t know what to do. Then I remembered, McDonalds serve breakfast until 11.30 a.m.
56
« on: August 26, 2013, 02:55:30 PM »
I was on a train this morning, in the loo.having a shit, when a voice called out "Can I see your ticket please?" "Not right now." I replied, "I'm having a shit."  "I don't believe you." Said the voice. "Slide it under the door." "No probs," I said. "The yellow bits are Sweetcorn!"
57
« on: August 26, 2013, 02:53:13 PM »
58
« on: August 15, 2013, 09:54:04 PM »
Experts tell us that the best way to make a perfect cup of tea is to agitate the bag.. So, every morning I shout, 'Two sugars, fat arse! '
59
« on: August 15, 2013, 09:51:34 PM »
A guy is watching a film with creepy organ music on the TV when he suddenly yells, “Don't enter that church, you damn fool !!!” His wife asks him, “What are you watching?” Husband replies, “Our bloody wedding video”
60
« on: August 15, 2013, 09:48:23 PM »
Definition of a thong! Years ago you had to open a womans knickers to see her arse. Nowadays you have to open her arse to see her knickers. How many animals can you fit into a pair of ladies jeans? 2 calves, 1 beaver, 1 ass, 1 pussy, countless hares, the occasional cock, and a fish no one can find! 
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