Whats the crappest bike you've ever owned and why?

[Bryanj]

You had a unique one!

[MrDavo]

I loved my T140V, it was fast, had loads of torque and good handling.

I did, however seem to spend an hour fixing it for every hour I rode i. I bought it new and traveled nearly 20,000 miles, but by the time I sold it, it was a proper Trigger’s broom having had a few trivial repairs such as another frame (cracked) and another crank (twisted). The wife just pointed out it did help pull her, so not all bad.   

[matthewmosse]

Cb250 nighthawk a contender, whilst boringly reliable, the forks wore through the chrome inside of 30k kilometres, finish wasnt up to much, and exhaust studs snapped off in the head despite 6 monthly removal and copper slipping of the nuts after the first event. Rival to that bmwr80rt. Love hate thing with that bike, handled great, good engine, gearbox a bit crap, and switchgear awful, ditto electrical system generally. Dim dip switch prone to fall  to bits leaving you with no headlight. I had 2 of these, both same issues, compared to my 500/4  they were expensive to run in mechanical terms, drank fuel, and less reliable- particularly the electrics. The 500/4 went round the clock twice, saw more winter use, and needed 1 new fuse and the tail light wire bypassing in 220k miles or thereabouts.  Yes it also needed engine work ( RIP it out, throw in another) but the bmws complex wiring was their Achilles heel. I ended up with a big box of headlight relays that sometimes worked etc. Really hammered home the fact, simplicity is king, the same manufacturer for switchgear (tec) on both 500/4 and BMW r80,  same headlight bulb and basic electricall functions. I seemed to be testing or swapping relays or switchgear on the bmws but never on the Honda which had one relay, for the indicators, that was it, and it worked reliably.

[mike the bike]

The K75 relay used to stick on permanently if the battery voltage went low. 
It wasn't the first time it had been looked at because the relay had insulting  tape around the join.

[philward]

Ducati 160 Monza - vibrated everything off and electrics barely worked (is that called character?) - was not my main bike thank god - first and last Italian bike

[Tomb]

Strange how someones worst bike can also be someone else's best, my dad had a Monza Junior, he loved it, reliable as hell, good brakes, and he thrashed it everywhere. He sold it to buy another bike and then regretted it.

[Bryanj]

Most problem bike sold from shop i worked at was a 500 four, came back to us at least twice a week for not running properly but when tested by me or the boss was fine.

After about 3-4 weeks of this i was early to work and saw the owner dropping the bike off in the sidestreet again, nice bloke but getting fed up, had a chat about the exact problem and then he had to go to work, lifted the seat and took out his leggings.
I promptly fell about and sold/gave him a bungie strap

Never saw it,apart from service, again!!!


Not my worst bike but thought you might like the laf

[mike the bike]

I've done that with my gloves.  Took 15 minutes diagnosing the fault before I realised. 🤔

[MCTID]

I heard about a Lady some years ago who had problems with her new car...the fuel consumption was awful and it ran like a pig. The Mechanics looked at it a couple of times and couldn't find anything wrong. Running out of patience, the Service Receptionist smelt a rat when she said that it 'lurched' along when she was driving, so he said let's go for a drive and I'll sit in the passenger seat to see what's happening. The Lady got into the Drivers seat, pulled out the choke knob and hung her handbag on it !

Who remembers the American Tourist hiring a car in London and driving up to the Lake District. When she reached Carlisle the car was ferked and wouldn't run properly so she drove into to the local office of the Hire Company......she'd put it into second gear and driven all the way in second as she was used to driving Automatics !

LOL. Shouldn't laugh.

[SteveD CB500K0]

My mum had one of those Minis with the pull-out choke. It also had sliding windows and a pull cord door handle (inside)




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[Green1]

That was probably my nan with the Mini because thats what she used to do with hers.
I remmember when I was young sitting in the back with my little sister who always sat behind my nan. The car lerching back and forth everywere it went.
On day my nan turned around to my mum and said why does she keep hitting me on the head? Mum turns around and said its your crap driving. The car stutering used to cause my sister to fall of the seat. 
That was an early Mini in white, hinges on the outside of the doors and pull cord handles. That was stolen to order the day after my Grandad put a new engine in it   

She was a crap driver she managed to crash in to a shopping trolly in an empty car park.

She had three or four and they all rusted away I used to poke my fingers through the tops of the wings

[Woodside]

Didn't every BL car come with a clothes peg for the choke

[Bryanj]

Nah, that was Hillmans.

Having started the stories link, my uncle had a garage not far from park bakeries in Oldham and had 2 Mk1 escorts in on the same weel, both 3 yrs old and registrations close to each other, one a reps car and one the typical old ladies car, reps in for a service, old ladies in for new engine

[cooleronthecoast]

A good work friend of mine had a beige Ford Escort Mk2 back in the early 80's.  It was only an 1100, but it would probably be worth a few bob these days if he still had it.  Anyways I digress.  He came into work one morning with a broad smile on his face and I asked what was so amusing.  He said the previous evening he had left work as normal at 5pm and got into his car to drive home.  About half a mile after leaving the car park he switched on the radio and thought to himself WTF!!  Radio 2!  I never listen to Radio 2 (he was in his early 20's at the time).  Then he looked on the passenger seat and saw a copy of that days Sun newspaper.  WTF! I don't buy the Sun!!  Then he realised it wasn't his car.   He turned around and went back to work to find his car about 5 spaces down from where he had driven off in someone elses (obviously) more or less identical Escort.  Long before remote key fobs, his  Escort keys fitted the 'other' Escort's door and ignition barrel perfectly.   I can't recall if he ever met and told the other cars owner what had happened.

[SteveD CB500K0]

I had a MkII Escort that would open and run using the key from my 550K3