When Spike Milligan was in the Army in WWII, he attached a pushbike inner tube to his willy so that he didn't need to get up for a pee in the field at night. He tied the other end with a piece of string and when he got up he emptied it.
All was well until one of his 'colleagues' untied the piece of string while Spike was asleep...........
(Yep, I know all about 2 hours on and two hours off doing Guard duties out in the field....but it's still a good story).
